Diary of a Wimpy Kid Wiki

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Diary of a Wimpy Kid Wiki
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September

This page consists of the first month of the main storyline of Diary of a Wimpy Kid (online).

September[]

Tuesday, September 7th[]

Sissy

A 7th grader named Greg Heffley is starting a new school year. He immediately addresses the format of the book to be journal-like, saying that he won't be writing his feelings in the diary and preferring to call it a journal instead after telling Ann Heffley to buy a book that doesn't have the word "diary" on it. Greg says that Rodrick Heffley, his brother, has to scrub toilets because of his diary, so Greg tries to be very careful around him and others.

Greg's only reason to write in a journal was so he could give it to reporters and interviewers to avoid answering questions personally to save time when he becomes rich and famous.

He then reveals that it was his first day of middle school, and tells the reader that they better be careful when choosing a seat because it's more than likely to be permanent one. Greg wasn't so careful and ended up getting stuck with Chris Hosey in front of him and Lionel James behind him. Otha Harris came in late and almost sat to his right but Greg stopped it from happening.

Greg says that next time he's just going to sit down in the middle of a bunch of girls but ponders his decision, saying girls are complicated. In homeroom, he got stuck with a teacher that Rodrick had a few years before.

Wednesday, September 8th[]

Greg is forced by Ann to give Rodrick some of his money so he could pay for his lunch. Greg is still mad with Rodrick over the incident that happened over the summer.

Occurring on the first day of summer vacation, Rodrick wakes up Greg in the middle of the night, saying that he slept through the entire summer and that it's his first day of middle school and he's late. Greg rushes in preparation for school downstairs at the kitchen but all the noises led to him being caught by Frank Heffley, eating Cheerios at 3 AM. Greg tells him Rodrick was the cause of all of this, but when they go down to the basement, Rodrick plays truant by pretending to sound fast asleep in his bed. Greg now thinks that Frank thought he was an idiot and a liar.

Thursday, September 9th[]

Online22

In social studies, the teacher made everybody sit in alphabetical order which ends up putting Greg next to Alex Aruda who notes this is a big win due to Alex being smart and extremely easy to copy off.

Greg says at his school kids whose last names start with the first few letters of the alphabet are always the smartest. The only kid he could think of that broke the rule was Peter Uteger who was the smartest kid in the class all the way until the 5th grade. He ended up having a hard time when many kids started calling out his initials and turned him into a C student.

Greg then introduces Manny Heffley, his younger brother. He is completely spoilt by Ann and Frank, and let him get off scot-free on everything he does, such as when he wrote on Greg's door with a marker. He also calls Greg "Bubby", which he doesn't like, and has kept the name secret for five years, with some close calls. Greg says that the only good thing about having Manny around is that Rodrick stopped making Greg sell chocolate bars for his school fundraisers.

Friday, September 10th[]

Online23

During Physical Education, Greg goes over to the basketball court to see if a piece of moldy cheese that had been sitting there since the previous year was still there, and it was.

He brings up the "Cheese Touch," an infamous game at his school. It started when Darnell Washington tripped and brushed the Cheese with his finger and started the whole thing where kids would start passing on to other kids. Eventually, a kid named Abe Hall got the Cheese Touch and took it with him when he moved away to California.

The only way to protect yourself from the Cheese Touch is to cross your fingers. During the last week of the previous year, Greg taped up his crossed fingers, at the price of getting a D In handwriting.


Saturday, September 11th[]

Online Book33

It's the first weekend after the first week of middle school, and as usual, Greg isn't able to enjoy sleeping in because he eventually can't stand the taste of his own breath, and that Dad comes in at 6:00am every day, doing vacuuming or something else. He also finds that after 1:00pm, there's nothing else on TV except bowling or golf, and that the sun shining through the sliding glass door makes it difficult to see the TV screen anyway, and that you get all hot and sweaty on the chair, which gets yourself stuck on it.

Greg then introduces Frank's arch enemy, a teenager named Lenwood Heath, who frequently toilet papers houses and knocks down garbage cans. His troubles ended up with his parents sending him off to a military academy in Pennsylvania during the summer, making Frank's life much more relaxed.

Greg then introduces his best friend, Rowley Jefferson, who is the same age but is much more different in personality, as he still acts like a little kid. Greg then says he has tried to avoid Rowley since the first day after he asked Greg if he wanted to "play" at his house in front of some teenagers, despite Greg telling him that since they're in Middle School, you say "Hang Out", but Rowley doesn't listen. Greg still enjoys having Rowley around anyway, because he can use the tricks he learnt from Rodrick on him, and the fact Rowley never squeals at him.

Greg then tells the story of how he and Rowley met, after Greg's old former best friend, Ben Fielders moved to Piscataway, Greg was on the verge for a new best friend, and Rowley knocks on his door one day after moving from Ohio, holding a book named How to Make Friends in New Places. Greg isn't impressed, but once he hears of Rowley owning a PlayStation and 42 games, it sells him.

Sunday, September 12th[]

Greg didn't have a great day, after Frank rans into Mr. Swann at church, who tells Frank all about Bishop Garrigan High School, the school that his kids (including one named Dan Swann) of the same ages of the Heffley kids, go to. Frank's carpool passes by their house every night and he sees the kids always working out.

Monday, September 13th[]

Online book43- Online book- Chimps

Greg wakes up thinking it was still summer vacation. Every morning, he is forced to make Manny's breakfast and then he sits on his plastic potty to eat it, before dumping anything he couldn't eat into it. Ann gets on Greg about not finishing his breakfast but Greg says she wouldn't have any appetite if she had to scrape Cheerios out of a potty every morning.

At school, the class gets assigned to reading groups. Although you couldn't tell if you were in the easy or hard group, it was simple by the books you were given out. For example, hard readers got Einstein as a Child, while easy readers got Bink Says Boo. Greg ends up in the hard group, to which he isn't happy about. He attempted to prevent this outcome last year by purposely mispronouncing simple words and writing a mediocre four-page essay about Chimps.

Greg suspects that Ann stepped in and made sure he got put in the higher classes because she knows Greg's principal. Though, he has learnt from Rodrick to set people's expectations real low so you end up surprising them by doing almost nothing at all. Eventually Greg changes his attitude because he saw a couple of kids holding Bink Says Boo books upside-down and didn't think they were joking.

Tuesday, September 14th[]

Albert Sandy

Greg had to listen to Albert Sandy bragging about how his parents bought him a 36-inch T.V. and a DVD player and a bunch of other stuff for his bedroom.

Albert talking about his T.V. reminds Greg of the summer job he had over the summer where Greg was tasked with taking care of Mrs. and Mr. Rose's dog Stevie while they went on a trip, and would pay him three dollars a day. However, Stevie proves to be an issue for Greg, and he suspects the dog doesn't like doing his business with strangers around, with Greg wasting a ton of time in the hot sun. Eventually, Greg decides to clean all of his messes at once once Stevie started pooping in the kitchen, and decides to simply clean up the dog on the day before the Roses get back. However, Greg is soon shocked to find out that the Roses came home a day early, and refuse to pay Greg.

Wednesday, September 15th[]

Greg made Manny a bowl of cereal, but this time pours the milk in first, ending up with Manny to go into a hysterical breakdown. Ann comes down, and Greg tells her what happened. Instead of telling Manny to eat his cereal, she forces Greg to pour in another bowl of cereal in the right order claiming that she wouldn't eat it either.

This type of babysitting happened a couple weeks ago as well when Ann took time off of work just to cut Manny's sandwich in quarters at daycare after he threw a huge fit.

Thursday, September 16th[]

Greg wanted Christine Coolidge to be his lab partner, however she claimed that she already had a partner. Later, Greg caught her red-handed going up to Bryce Anderson, asking him to be her partner. He mentions how Bryce used to hate girls back in Elementary School, but now doesn't.

Greg wasn't surprised about this, but complains how complex popularity compared in elementary where it is based on how fast you can run and that man was Ronnie Jones. He brings up Slam Books which are basically notebooks listing the top 24 most popular kids. Greg attempted to explain all this to Rowley on the bus ride home, but Rowley wasn't paying attention.

Friday, September 17th[]

Frank shows Greg some new addition to his Civil War Battlefield Diorama in the basement. He mentions that this is what Frank likes to do, compared to most dads. Frank would prefer to work on the diorama for hours but Ann forces him to watch romantic comedies with her. One time, Frank manages to sneak away for the entire movie by putting pillows under his blanket and didn't catch on his decoy until after the movie ended, ending up with Frank in Ann's dog house for a long time on that one.

Frank is also very protective of the diorama and bans both Greg and Rodrick from touching it and also tries to scare Manny from going down there. He also thinks Rowley is a klutz and believes he will break the diorama in one move, to the point that every time he comes round, Frank tells him that the basement is off limits.

Saturday, September 18th[]

Greg watches cartoons on TV, but knows the other reason why he doesn't get up early: Frank's chores, which takes out the joy of doing nothing. Greg then decides to go to Rowley's house for the first time since the June in the previous year, mainly because Rowley's dad dislikes him.

It started when Greg and Rowley watched a corny movie about two kids who knew a secret language. They got inspired but couldn't copy the kids well, so they make up their own language and use it at dinner, saying that Rowley's Dad smells like a women - ending up with him kicking out Greg.

Sunday, September 19th[]

Closedmouth

Greg explained that last night at Rowley's house ended up being a nightmare.

It started when Rowley's mom told the friends they had enough screen time at 7:00pm and needed to do something else like read a book. Greg and Rowley started playing some board games but Rowley would use the bathroom every 5 minutes so it would make their game go on forever. Every time Rowley came back, he would kick a sombrero which got on Greg's nerves so at one point he put a dumbbell under it which injured Rowley's leg. His dad came down in no time flat however there weren't enough evidence that Greg was the one who did it since Rowley didn't see him put it under the sombrero.

At 9:00pm, Greg finds out it was bedtime and wouldn't have come if he knew it beforehand. There was also only one bed so he had to share a bed with Rowley. In the middle of the night, Rowley had a nightmare and screamed, causing Greg to fall on the floor. Rowley slept in his parent's room for the rest of the night giving Greg his bed. The next morning Greg went straight home and ate a bunch of junk cereal to recover from the traumatic experience.

Monday, September 20th[]

Online book80

Greg talks about how much he enjoys video games, and is playing one titled Twisted Wizard for five days straight. The only problem he has is that the game doesn't save your progress, which is what happened when Mom turns off Greg's system unknowingly before Greg gets home.

He is super good at them, and has victories recorded on tape to prove it. However, Frank isn't a fan and makes him go outside and do something "Active". Greg tries to get out of it, but he still kicks him out anyway.

Whenever Frank kicks Greg out the house, Greg simply goes down to Collin Lee's house then lists reasons why he is friends with Collin:

  1. His dad owns every Spider-Man comic book since 1968
  2. He likes to watch Greg play video games more than playing it himself

He prefers playing video games with Collin, because Rowley on the other hand isn't a serious game and a simple way to beat him is that if you name your car on a game called Formula One Racing something ridiculous, he falls to pieces. He also prefers Greg to "take turns" for him.

On his way back home he went through the Thompson's to make it seem like he was exercising the whole time which worked on Frank but backfires after Ann made Greg take a shower.

Tuesday, September 21st[]

Frank kicks Greg out the house again, but this time he goes over to see Rowley in order to set off his new model rocket. However, when the rocket does go off, the wind carries it away to the woods where a bully named Herbie Reamer hangs out. Greg doesn't know much about Herbie other than the fact he used to terrorize Rodrick and his friends when they were Greg's age.

One time, when Greg was telling Frank about Herbie, he tells Greg about his childhood bully Sam Sharman, who twisted the skin of kids' hands until they cry. Eventually, all the neighborhood parents tell the principal of Sam's school about what he did, ending with Sam bursting into tears and never picked on anyone again, to the point that he's now a really nice person while working as an Air Conditioner Repairman.

When Greg walked back home, Ann was steamed that he was late for dinner. Greg then lies that the clock was wrong, but Ann sees through it and calls Rowley's Mom and is now going to come up with a punishment. To Greg's defense, he learned that idea from Ann anyway, where one time he found out Greg wasn't brushing his teeth and made a fake phone call to Dr. Stevens asking if they had wooden dentures - to the point Greg still brushes his teeth five times a day.

Greg then compares the punishments that Ann and Frank do. With Frank, he simply throws the nearest thing at you, while with Ann she waits a few days to think of the punishment. To try and get out of it, you do things to impress her until you forget about the punishment, which is when she gets you. Thankfully, she is soft and you can get out of it if you feel low.

Wednesday, September 22nd[]

Online book93
Online book100

Greg tries to do a good thing and washes Ann's car to try and ease the punishment. However, he uses Brillo to wash the exterior, and when Greg washes the soap off it also washes the paint off where Greg used the Brillo. Worse, Manny saw the whole thing and Greg knew he would tattle on him to Ann.

He mentions that Manny has always been a snitch ever since he could talk. One time, Greg broke the sliding glass door but Ann and Frank couldn't point it back to him, and three years later Manny squeals at him. Greg then thinks about the bad things he did before Manny could speak and believes he will snitch about those as well. Greg then mentions that he used to act the same until one day he snitched on Rodrick for saying a bad word to which Ann makes him spell it out, being quite a long one. In this case, Rodrick got of scot-free while Greg got a bar of soap in his mouth for spelling the bad word.

Greg then decides to use a technique he learnt from Rodrick, he would pretend to run away from home forever and come back ten minutes later. He imagines Manny crying, but instead, Manny eats Greg's giant Hershey's Kiss. When Ann does come home, he simply spoils the beans about what he did, knowing it was better to be punished for that than leaving Manny alone. Ann simply frowns and decides to wait until Frank went home.

Greg on the other hand knows another trick from Rodrick, he could call Gramma and invite her to dinner, because it would minimize anything bad that could happen. Thankfully, when Frank did come home, nothing was mentioned about Greg's troubles.

Rodrick then tells Greg about "The Belt", although Greg doesn't believe Frank would use that thing, although Rodrick says otherwise. To prevent Frank from doing so, Greg cuts out articles from parenting magazines that say that kind of punishment is frowned upon and puts them in whatever book Frank is reading. Greg finishes once Frank starts coming up the stairs.

Thursday, September 23rd[]

It ends up that Frank wasn't that mad at all, simply telling Greg not to use Brillo again on a car. As for Ann, she gives Greg a punishment - he has to clean up the whole basement from top to bottom, but the problem was solved quicker than usual when Greg asks Rowley to help as well. She also threatens that if Greg lies again his video games will be taken away for good.

Greg drifts his focus back to school. He has to do a book report for an assignment in English, but he doesn't have an issue with that because of the book he has milked for the past five years - Encyclopedia Brown Does It Again. He uses it because the book has twelve short stories and treats each one like a whole book, then writes what the teachers want to hear, never noticing it being a whole book.

Friday, September 24th[]

Greg says he has kept the honesty promise laid down on him by Ann pretty well for over 35 hours. However, he encounters a few situations where honesty has backfired on him.

Earlier on in the day Greg had a conversation with Max Smedley where he tells Greg that he wants to be a Professional Basketball Player, but Greg says his size wouldn't go anywhere; causing Max to cry and Greg defending himself to Mr. Smedley by saying that he can't tell a lie.

Another example was during Rowley's Grandpa birthday party, where Rowley's Grandpa stated he wanted a chocolate cake for his birthday next year, but Greg states that he could have one if he was alive next year, leading to Rowley's parents glaring at him.

Saturday, September 25th[]

Online book111

Greg continues his honesty promise when he answers a call by Mrs. Gretchen. Ann tells Greg to tell her that she's not here however Greg made her stand outside, and once the call was over she didn't speak to Greg for the rest of the day. Greg theorises the promise was cancelled and is happy he can go back to the way he was before.

Rodrick also breaks his Saturday sleeping record. Frank decides that Rodrick had spent enough time sleeping and kicked him out of the basement at 3:30pm, but Rodrick simply decides to sleep on the couch instead until it was time for dinner.

Sunday, September 26th[]

CLONK

During the ride to church, Greg makes funny faces at Manny, making him spit juice all over the car seat and causes him to laugh hard. However, when Ann says that Manny could have choked to death, Manny bursts into tears and the rest of the ride to church was made pretty miserable.

Greg meets his old friend Ben at church. Greg mentions that Ann wouldn't let him sit near Ben's family because they got giggly and jokey, saying "Peas be with You" to each other, to the point that Ben actually bought some peas and both lost it. Since then, they haven't sat near each other.

After church, they passed by the Smedley's house, a family with six boys, but you couldn't tell any of them apart. Their dream is to win the grand prize on America's Funniest Home Videos.

Monday, September 27th[]

Greg realized that his Pre-Algebra book belonged to Jimmy Jury, the most popular kid in the eighth grade. He suspects that is a good thing even though he didn't write his name down on it. However, Greg discovers that things have evened out anyway when he notices his science book used to belong to Brian Gleeson, a notoriously nerdy kid.

In Phys Ed, A couple of girls caused a stir when they presented a petition to Mr. Underwood because they wanted to do the same push-ups that the boy are doing. Greg knows the girls got this idea from History, where they were learning about Martin Luther. Mr. Underwood allows the girls to do the same push-ups as the boys but some begin to regret their choice. Greg gets inspired by this and puts together his petition saying that boys should be allowed to do girl push-ups. He soon decides to hold it off after noticing the group of kids who wanted to sign it - none of which were athletic.

Tuesday, September 28th[]

It was the start of the new TV-watching season. Frank makes Popcorn for Greg and Ann, and he puts Manny to bed. However, Manny comes right back down and Ann switches the channel back to the cartoon channel Manny was watching, annoying Greg.

Greg mentions that this kind of thing never happened to him when he was a little kid. He did it once or twice but Frank put a stop to that after telling him that he could run into Shel Silverstein in the hallway due to a picture of the author appearing on the back of a book named "A Light in the Attic", which was one of Greg's favorite books when he was younger. Greg admits he would rather wet the bed than see Silverstein in the hallway.

Wednesday, September 29th[]

After Manny went to bed the previous night, Greg was able to watch his shows but turns out that they're the same thing over and over again. He then has the idea to write up a TV show called Jerome The Man With Incredibly Red Lips. Once he shows Ann, she suggests to make a whole plot from beginning to end, and then Greg writes up Wise Up, Mr. Lockerman. Although she wasn't keen on Greg's style of humor, she was still interested because he was doing something other than play videos and said that she would get a video camera from work tomorrow.

Thursday, September 30th[]

Greg gets the camera from Ann, and comes up with an idea for a movie by pretending to be sick during Phys Ed. Greg writes down The Boy whose family thinks he's a DOG, where Rowley portrays a Dog-Boy and his parents believe he's a dog. However, Rowley rejects the idea because the part Greg gave him was humiliating and throws the storyboards down.

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